One of the great pleasures in my life has been maintaining my friendships with so many of my Darlington classmates. Perhaps no one has accomplished that better than my friend and classmate Bob Elkins – whom my classmates have designated as our “Class Agent for Life” because of his unfailing service in keeping us all connected with Darlington and to each other over the past 40 years!
We look forward to our upcoming 60th class reunion in the fall – Lord, can we really be that old! During my recent conversations with Bob, I had the opportunity to ask him a number of questions about his life as a student at Darlington and what the school has meant to him in the years since our graduation. Here are some of Bob’s reflections on his lifelong connection with Darlington:
When did you start at Darlington?
I came to Darlington as a boarding student in 1959. My older brother, James Elkins ’58, had been a four-year boarding student and my parents thought Darlington had been a positive and enriching experience for him, so now it was my turn.
You give back to Darlington in more ways than one - can you share why you give back to Darlington?
I would not be where I am without Darlington and those wonderful, dedicated teachers and mentors I had. Hopefully my contributions to the school will help perpetuate the guidance and encouragement I received when I urgently needed it.
Further, I have been class agent for the Class of ’63 for more than 40 years, so I refer to myself as Class Agent for Life. This keeps me in touch with my classmates, which I enjoy, and also keeps me in touch with the Advancement Office, which makes me feel like I am still part of the school. About the only duty of a class agent is to write a newsletter to classmates once or twice a year which always includes a solicitation for donations. I have come to appreciate that the school requires money to operate and that alumni contributions are often the difference between being merely good and being truly excellent.
After my classmate, Sam Moss, announced his retirement last year after 40 years on the faculty, I reached out to some classmates with close ties to the school for ideas about how we could honor Sam’s long tenure and help Darlington attract and retain the kind of faculty that meant so much to us in our formative years. One classmate offered to post a $50,000 challenge to raise money for a faculty salary enhancement fund. We decided to establish a Teacher Salary Enhancement Endowment and have already raised over $184,000, which includes gifts from 23 donors. Two of these are $25,000 gifts from testamentary bequests from classmate’s estates.
Going forward, we are hoping that many of Sam’s 4,000 former college advisees (40 years X 100 advisees/year) will contribute to the endowment. And maybe some of the grateful parents and grandparents of those advisees will contribute as well. But contributions from everyone will be warmly received and gratefully appreciated. Anyone wishing to contribute should send a check to the Advancement Office marked SME (Sam Moss Endowment), FSEE (faculty salary enhancement endowment) or a similar notation. And any contributions to a Darlington fund can be made in memory of someone or in honor of someone.
Were you a boarding or day student?
I was a boarding student. We had three boys’ dorms: South Hall, Old Main and the Field House.
Who were your favorite teacher(s), coach(es), and/or faculty?
My favorite teachers were Alex Whitaker, Bruce Burch, and Bert Hudnall, but every teacher I had made an impression on me.
Coach Jim Doss was larger than life -- a big, tough man who pushed us to do our best whatever our best might be. He was also my math teacher and a dorm parent, so I saw a lot of him.
Coaches Mike Knighton and Cannon Mayes were also mentors and role models. Both had played college football, but demonstrated that success in life required intellect, integrity, fair play, and accepting responsibility for your actions above all else. Track coach Bruce Burch was the same -- play to win, but giving your best effort and playing fair were more important than winning. And being a good teammate was a moral obligation.
These individuals were all part of a team that motivated us and prepared us for the next phase of our lives.
What activities were you involved in during your Darlington experience?
Sports were an important part of my Darlington experience. I already knew that I was not good at golf, tennis or basketball, so I tried a lot of other sports in hopes that I would find something that I was good at. I was on the football, soccer, track and wrestling teams at different times, but never did find a sport I was really good at. But I kept playing because I valued the camaraderie with my teammates above all.
Is there anything else about your time at Darlington that you would like to share?
Being a boarding student, I lived in close quarters with all kinds of people. And I learned how to get along with people who I did not like, or who did not like me, and who were different from me.
I cherish the bonds I formed at Darlington, even to this day. The Class of ’63 always has a good turnout for our class reunions and we still reminisce about our most favorite or least favorite teachers, and especially about those who inspired us. We also talk about pranks, scandals, and funny stories like they happened yesterday.
What would you extract from your Darlington experience as the most useful skill set in your life today - whether professionally, personally, or both?
I learned to listen and evaluate rather than to be impulsive and say the first thing that came to mind. Hurtful words cannot be unspoken, and some cannot be forgotten.
Post Darlington, what was your educational path?
We had a number of teachers with Vanderbilt degrees who impressed me, so I chose to attend Vanderbilt in hopes that I would turn out like they did. I graduated from Vanderbilt in 1967, the height of the Vietnam War, so I joined the Air Force rather than be drafted. The military career counselors and senior officers all emphasized that advanced degrees were the key to advancement, so I completed an MBA degree while on active duty.
What has your professional path been?
First, I was an Air Force pilot and aspired to be a career officer. Over time, I decided that I would like to become an airline pilot. Unfortunately, I was in an automobile accident in 1973 that left me with a disability that disqualified me from being an airline pilot or a military officer, so I enrolled in law school. I wanted to be a trial lawyer, so I first became a prosecutor because prosecutors try many jury trials while their classmates at big firms typically spend years carrying briefcases for other lawyers before they actually try a case.
After serving as an assistant district attorney in Athens, Georgia, for four years, I went into private practice with a firm in Athens. The two senior partners were committed to excellence and gladly shared their experiences and advice which has served me well.
Can you shed some light on the Darlington relationships that have made/continue to make an impact in your life?
As mentioned above, being class agent has kept me in touch with many of my classmates over the years. It has also kept me in touch with the school’s staff, faculty and administration. That camaraderie over the years has kept my Darlington experience alive and relevant.
For our young alums, those in their undergraduate pursuits, what advice would you offer concerning the first steps in their careers post-undergrad?
The first thing every college student should do is take a vocational aptitude test, even if you are confident in your career aspirations. These tests can identify career fields you should avoid as well as identify career fields that seem suited for you. As that great philosopher Yogi Berra once said, “If you don’t know where you are going, you will wind up someplace else.”
Are you willing to support our Darlington Connects community? If so, can we connect you with those looking for support?
Although I like to think that wisdom comes with age and maturity, I think current students looking for support and guidance would be better served by mentors and role models who are in their mid-career years. I am retired, so I cannot invite a student to go to court with me or to shadow me during a typical day at a law office.
However, being retired does not mean that the game is over. We should all appreciate each new day as a precious gift. Keep playing the game hard, run full speed past third, and slide headfirst into home (when the time comes)!!!
